Personal Empowerment, Developing human potential, Fostering interpersonal relationships

Personal Empowerment

Developing human potential and fostering interpersonal relationships

5 Dating Tips for Introverts

Introverts in particular find it awkward and painful to reach out to anyone let alone a potential date. Often they are held back by fear of rejection, especially if that rejection happens in public.

So let’s look at 5 strategies that an introvert can use to approach a date.

One: Accept that you are going to be rejected. This may sound couter intuitive. However, believing that you are not going to get what you want pre-empts dissappointment and the pain which comes with it. In other words "what have you got to loose". This help removes tension because you have already prepared for a negative response. This in turn leaves breathing space to muster the confidence which is so vital for projecting yourself positively to a stanger irrespective of the consequences.

Two: Lower expectations: If you are approaching a date in the same way you are proposing to marry someone then this creates an exagerated sense of significance. Consquently you experience unwarranted expectations that if anything will frighten your prospective date because they feel being encroached upon. Aim for small incremental goals that will not trigger any defense mechanisms from your date. Light introductory conversation and a few jokes are generally less invasive ways of trying to engage someone.

Three: Practice: The skills involved in dating often overlap with those in mundane daily interaction. Introversion and the social isolation which comes with it can often produce anger, tension and hostility. Needless to say this pre-empts effective dating. Concertrating on seemingly insignficant acts which seemingly have nothing to do with dating such as interaction with friends, co-workers gives one vital practice when dating does happen. Things like proactive greetings, maintaining eye contact and trying to strike up a mundane conversation can have a snowball effect by removing what seemed to be insurmountable barriers to interacting productively with a date.

Four: Anticipate the setting:Introverts operates across a narrower band of situations than extroverts. They are more self conscious and tend to shy away from large gatherings in particular where they feel uncomfortable in public. It is therefore important for introverts to understand and anticipate any defensive responses to certain situations. These situations can either used as avenues to grow by developing new patterns of behaviour or pre-empted by seeking alternatives. For example, certain people prefer dating sites rather than single gatherings or use one to build enough confidence to try another.

Five: Avoid feelings of desperation: Because introverts network less this limits opportunities leading to feelings of hopelessness. This self imposed isolation is exacerbated when introverts see others on a relationships while they are still alone. It is therefore vital that introverts pre-empt despair by networking which in this day and age is significantly easier due to to proliferation of dating sites, on-line support groups etc.

So for more examples on this and other dating tips please subscribe to our YouTube channel.